The Journey of a Youth Pastoral Worker (In A Gist)

I shifted from Sabah, Kota Kinabalu when I was 18, to the “wild wild west” (Kuala Lumpur), excited to begin my studies in a concrete city with young and naive ambition and dreams. God seemed to have a very different plan from what I had in mind. I was not very much a Practising Catholic back in Sabah. I knew God was real due to some personal prayers that were answered, I went to church at times and occasionally joined Mass and some events, however truly knowing God and what His Church was about was still quite shallow then. A large part of my encounter in faith happened back when I was studying and working in secular fields. By some funny grace, due to a promise I made to God - as I lost a bet I made with Him🙄, I was obliged to keep my promise and joined the youth ministry in SFX, and from there it was all downhill (or is it uphill). On a more serious note, my desire to journey with youths and help them through what I too went through grew stronger.

All I knew was to follow what was already familiar and taught to be the “right” way of ministry

Being a youth myself and also having encountered the joys of being part of a faith community back then, I began this Youth Pastoral work journey in 2015, not fully knowing what I was stepping into. I was in a media and marketing company and just had resigned when an opening for a Youth Pastoral Worker was offered. The Youth Pastoral contract allowed me to continue with my graphic designing freelance work to have a more sustainable income as the parish was not able to provide a full worker’s salary. Equipped was just designing skills, divided time and the heart for youths, I accepted the opening for a Youth Pastoral Worker role in the parish. You don’t really know what you don’t know until you enter into it, at least it was such for me. All I knew was to follow what was already familiar and taught to be the “right” way of ministry. It was fulfilling in many ways to be doing something that made a change directly in people’s lives, yet also in the process of trying to apply what I understood should work, I made many mistakes, laughed, cried, broke many relationships, struggled through in the effort to do what I knew then as best with all my weaknesses and limitations. It came too with its many joys and graces of bringing people to a space of encountering God through community, nothing was wasted as God used all that was good and also bad to reveal the work that He was doing and the work that I still needed very much indeed within my own self. Many of these encounters and experiences served as very valuable lessons that was truly the most important part of my formation.

That is just a gist of the past journey. Fast forwarding to today, many things have changed within for me, and the vision of what youth ministry truly is about. The many challenges are long from over, but I trust that God is working still and guiding the whole process, building slowly the foundations which is the most time-consuming and important part for any building to be unshakable and built according to what He wills. What I can say without a doubt now, that the first and most important work is first the work that God has to do within you first, to first receive, to listen, to be at His feet like a Mary, before any Martha's work can truly be from God that authentically flows out to others. This is one of my favourite article on allowing God to first fill be the one to fill you like a reservoir instead of a canal: 

"Don't Give Away What's Meant for You". 

The pandemic, as difficult as it was, was the "blessing in disguise" I needed. I was forced to stop doing what was familiar, and face all the important questions which usually would be consumed by activities which all had its good intentions. As uncomfortable as it was, there was also an empty space for myself, which brought to the surface many issues that needed to be looked at. In a very new way, God entered into this space where I was just stuck without an answer. It is also in this space of nothingness that a strong inspiration came about: a desire to start something which allowed everyone to be able to live out their lives fruitfully as laity in any given field they are called to. I noticed more and more the struggles of working adults trying to live out their faith in the corporate world amidst the very secular and profit-centred demands which often came to a losing battle. It then led to us starting up a company called Spade & Cor which came from a desire to have a wholesome working place for people that is centred on the principles and values of God and His Church; where all can have the space, time and place which encourages them to grow in their faith and who they really are, and that naturally outflowing into their work. For the external community, we are working towards providing resources that helps them towards that vision of everyone becoming who God made them to be; being who they are in their identity as children of God, and doing what they are called to do in their own uniqueness. The hope is that this company touches all spheres of life within and out of the church, creating an ecosystem with serves to change the culture of this world. We are however starting from a very small sphere for the Christian community beginning with a webapp Scripture project that is engaging, drawing people to God through interaction, beauty and community building.

For the past year in the direct area of Youth Pastoral work, the attention has been on a few vital groundwork in reviewing and reassessing the job description of Youth Pastoral Workers according to the needs of the parish. This especially was important as we took time to discern areas we need to be formed in, which leads us to a deeper awareness of our charisms and how to integrate that with the specific needs of the local parish youths while considering the direction of the new parish priest.

For the past year, we worked on some of these areas:

• Formation of Youth Pastoral Workers
• Restructuring roles and areas of changes needed for the growth and formation of Youth Pastoral Workers
• Opening spaces of journey and formation for the local parish youths, and less on the campuses that has quick turnover and doesn’t allow for a deeper journeying and discipleship
• Activities and avenues that allows us to get to know and be in touch with youths, so to open up opportunities to journey with them

Some of the spaces and small groups that allow youths to find a place where they can feel safe and be authentic:

• Companioning group - men and women
• It is a place for those who are slightly more committed where they come together to ponder on Scripture, share and learning to listen
• Journey to Communion
• This is a non-threatening space open to all regardless where you are in your faith, for a time of guided Adoration before the Blessed Sacrament with music, followed by a time of sharing which is optional so that people can come as they are
• Badminton
• This is also a non-threatening place for youths to come together, which allows for a natural connection and building of relationships among each other.
• Women’s group
• This group is for those who desire that sororal (fraternal) journey in discovering deeper the true meaning of femininity through journeying together whether it’s through book studies, programmes, videos, and just the mere sharing of life in all its struggles. This group is still in the process of discernment on how best it can be formed, according to the needs of the women of the parish

Along with the few areas above, we are also exploring how the parish as a whole can be part of the life formation of a youth; how a youth can eventually be discipled in a wholesome way without them just being segregated into “youths” - “It takes a whole village to raise a child.” Looking back now, having followed the ministry template I was directly or indirectly formed in has brought much insight to what is truly bearing long-term fruit, and what is not. My goal and focus as a Youth Pastoral Worker is to journey with people and lead them into a discipleship relationship, where they truly have this intimate relationship with God; a relationship which is unfortunately so foreign to most even within the church, and from this deeply lived relationship that restores their identity, flow out their unique calling and mission which may look very different from what we're used to seeing in youth ministry as being "fruitful". I am still always learning what my call is as I encounter each complex and unique human being in my pastoral role; yet it is assuring that God knows each of us fully and that I only have to be faithful to what He is asking, one step at a time.

I’m truly grateful for the providence and generosity God has supplied through each of you, the loving support given and for the tremendous patience even in the seemingly inactivity post-covid and with the lack of update which is something we are working on; the “communication department”. As I clear out the clutter that is obstructing and distracting me from His true voice, learning to listen better and discern how the Holy Spirit is moving and calling me in the year 2024, the direction and goal is all the same towards the great commission of forming disciples (Mt 28:19); disciples who are truly in so in love with God that all their hearts can be only about that "one thing necessary": the God who made us and loves us to death. Bursting with this love we have first learned to sit with and receive, all our desires then only can be to form others for His Kingdom here on earth, according to the way He has uniquely made us.